If You Don’t Stand for Something You’ll Fall for Anything

Geplaatst op 17-03-2023

As the title states, if you don’t stand for something, you’ll fall for anything. It’s really up to you what you do or accept when dating online and off. So you can’t really blame your date entirely on something going sour, you allowed it in the first place. So you need to keep your eyes open here. This article will be about trying to avoid those predators and liars that want to date to get some fun in and then leave you hanging with no self regard for the one that they dated. It’s up to you to take the responsibility for your own safety and growth as a dater and a person. So listen carefully here.

This is called self-awareness, it’s not as hard as you may think to work with it. It’s simply no different then being aware of the boundaries and pitfalls there are to internet dating. You are going to be giving out physical, emotional, mental, and soul and spiritual views of yourself on these sites. Although that’s not a bad thing, people can use it as a bad thing. And thus you should probably want to guard yourself as much as you can from those predators and liars that are out there to use you.

Now, as a level headed male, I’m speaking for you women here. It’s highly important vigilant in your ‘survival instincts’ I’ll call it. You must use your head on the decisions you decide to make, don’t go selling your soul to the first man you see. Think how it will effect you in the long run, and if you’ll end up hating his face or not in a few days. Here’s a funny but serious way to put it: Would you take all your financial information and personal info and toss it about the room or in the trash? Would you take your most prized possessions you can possibly think of and hand it out to the next person you see? No. So then I ask myself, and you should too, why sell yourself out to some dead beat that you probably wont be seeing again in your life? You’re in the dating game to find a soul mate, not a normal mate. If you want this person to really love you for who you are, you need to show them who you really are, without giving out on certain desires. To do so would show you were a bit weak and those predators and liars will FEED off that if they know you were one to do it. Get someone that loves you for what you really are, not what they see.

If you got men that are trying to live a second childhood, don’t give in to their fragile egos. You’re better then that. Why join in with their adolescent behavior? You can be using that time finding a REAL man in your life. I get asked at times questions on how do you know when you got a real partner, or how can you be sure the one you got is a real partner? Well first you need to love and respect yourself. If you can’t love or respect yourself, you can’t possibly dish out love or respect to your partner. Now, on the subject of love, sex and yourself, you can never truly give to your (hopefully) soul mate, without accepting yourself first.

Next question I seem to get a lot would be the ‘Why do they always fail my expectations?”. Answer to that would be the fact that you expect too much. We are all human, believe it or not, so everyone makes mistakes and no one is perfect, so you can’t expect a prince charming, that’s unreal. Understand? You CAN’T be looking for what doesn’t exist here. Find the good qualities in the man, not what you were expecting. If you read their profiles you probably should never have expected more then that from them. In fact, if you’re the only one on the date that feels that way, then the one your dating is a keeper, because he or she didn’t have unreal expectations like you did. They accepted you for who you were. For what information you gave, that’s what they should expect from you. For what information they gave is what you should expect from them. If you can do this you would have a lot less disappointments in your dates. You would be able to relax more and enjoy your date. Perhaps they will surprise you down the road when they feel you really are the one they want. When that time comes you’ll get your reward for not judging them and not expecting the impossible. They give the information they wanted you to know, so work with that.

Now, so far from all this, I don’t want you to get me wrong here, yes, to you men out there, there are women us men need to watch out for. But there’s a lot more of a majority of men that use dating sites than there are women. And women naturally have it harder being as the first immature man that sees one will start thinking nasty thoughts and possibly try something. Women need self respect and dignity for themselves. Don’t give in to pressure, and if the man is already talking about sex the first date, you’re better off without him. It’s pretty obvious when a man is in it for the fun of it, or when a man is in it for the long run. It’s the latter you want, not the first. So help yourself by finding men that actually want a real relationship. Don’t set yourself up for predators. For example, that picture of you in a bikini is better off NOT on your profile. Don’t lure men in for the wrong reasons, because when you lure them in for the wrong reasons, only wrong will come of it.

Finally, there has been growing amounts of complaints of the same behavior in such men. So use these signs to possibly help stay away from them. Now, I’m not saying that IF a man says one of these, it means he’s a liar. Because there’s really just as much of a chance that they may be telling the truth and are just being honest, and honesty you WANT in a relationship. But what I am saying is that if a man does these, at least keep a weary eye out. And if its totally obvious he’s lying, don’t waste any more time on him. Here they are:

1. The man swears you’re the only one for him, but you find him on other dating sites and or mysteriously gone without a good excuse.

2. Lying about their age or pretending to be what they aren’t (If it looks to good, it MAY just be.)

3. If they don’t currently have a girlfriend (I’d hope not if using a dating site), then chances are they have ex’s, and may expect you to listen to them talk about it. (I wrote articles to hopefully avoid that though!)

4. They make plans to take you out again, talking about how madly they are in love with you, but then you find them standing you up and going out with other females. (Those kind of guys you don’t ever want to be with.)